Wednesday, August 25, 2010, 9:33 PM
Kadang-kala ia amat sukar bagi kita untuk menyempurnakan apa yang dikehendaki oleh orang tua. Kadang-kala juga, untuk kita menjadi seorang yang taat pada orang tua kita, terpaksa kita merelakan apa yang telah direncanakan mereka, walau seberat mana hati kita untuk melakukannya. Apatah lagi dengan umur kita yang masih muda ini, khususnya bagi mereka yang masih lagi dibawah jagaan orang tua.Walaupun pena dan nota-nota sekolah berkeliaran di atas meja, namun minda ku masih lagi melayang jauh memikirkan setiap kejadian yang telah berlaku. Bermacam-macam soalan berlegar-legar di kotak fikiran ku namun tidak satu pun yang dapat aku selesaikan. Buntu. Sesungguhnya aku dalam kebuntuan. Dengan berlinangan air mata darah sekalipun tidak mungkin dapat meredakan hati yang tidak tenteram ini.
Serta merta, di saat aku bersendirian, melayani fikiran, teringat aku pada suatu kisah di antara Rasulullah s.a.w dengan sahabatnya. Satu kisah di mana baginda ditanya siapakah yang harus diutamakan/dihormati. Lalu dijawabnya baginda tiga kali berturut-turut; Ibu sebelum baginda menyebut Ayah.
Lantas, aku tersenyum walaupun dengan deras, air mata ku bercucuran turun membasahi pipi.
Sometimes it isnt a bad thing afterall when the feelings you have for someone has to end. Sometimes it is better that way than continuing the feeling that might get you to no where. Sometimes when the feelings has neutralized, you'd be amazed by how the friendship has changed. Sometimes when you have that someone in your mind, you'd tend to do things to get their attention. You'd tend to shell yourself from being your true self. Perhaps just to show how mature and how good you are as a person, just to have their eyes on you. And that's when you become more reserved, hindering yourself to let them know the real you. Of cos revealing your yourself in a good way. Especially for women.Once frienship has acquired, i believe, the bond will become stronger. Well, basically because when you see someone as a friend, there's this kind of feeling inside of you just wouldnt mind to show your true self. In a way as in when you treat them as a friend, you can just talk to them anything and everything under the sun. In which inadvertently, it'll fortify the friendship as the 'reserved' you has finally crumbled down, thus all conversations will just flow like water. Which means, you'll have no fear or any kind of embarrassment, like having the thoughts of how you are being judged when you're trying to convey your says to them.
Life has been great. Reunions for the past few days with wonderful people were awesome. Especially during the karaoke session, the time when i really let everything all out. Aidilfitri clip in a week's time and definitely Raya-raya kampong celebration with them. Anticipating much! Well of cos, after the papers that is! (: 
